Thursday, October 21, 2010

Some people make to do lists. I make wish lists

I wish I was less awkward and better at talking to strangers. If some dude you've never seen before comes up to you as you're walking into the gym, starts talking to you and says "I saw you running..." is it friendly or creepy? I'm hoping friendly. I am always surprised when strangers talk to me. I don't know why I assume other people can't see me. They have eyes and I am not the Invisible Man. I like people but I am terrible at small talk and awkward at everything else.

I wish the candidates for State Assembly were less interested in my vote. Ken Krause came to my door, Harry Bronson's people keep calling me and I'm getting hounded by political surveys. It's rather annoying.

I wish I could opt out of the holidays sometimes, like skip Christmas one year or call in sick. Christmas comes every year so it seems like you should get to sit one out every once in a while. You could be all "Thanks dudes, but I'm cool. No overcrowded malls and 2 months of Christmas songs for me this year. I'll catch the next one." One year my family went to Florida for Christmas and squirrels attacked our house. So I can only imagine what Christmas would do if I tried to dodge it.

Sometimes I wish I didn't have such a sweet tooth. Or maybe had just one sweet tooth instead of 24. It's cake's fault for being so delicious.

I wish my dreams were invitation only. Maybe my unconscious could hire a bouncer to keep out the wankers and ghosts from the past. Last night I had a dream about a man who killed his wife and dumped her body in a lake. The dream wasn't scary or anything (I can't remember ever having a nightmare or scary dream. Even when bad things happen in my dreams, I am never afraid in them. Dream Jen is invincible. And can fly if she runs fast enough. Awake Jen is way less cool.) But when I woke up I was creeped out at myself for having dreamt* it.

I don't know if there are rules about how many wishes you can make at one time, so this last one is a hope.

I hope I can maintain all the endurance and speed I gained during summer training. Sometimes it feels weird not having a training plan to follow, but other times I like the freedom. I don't have trouble finding the motivation to work out. I need the motion. If I don't get some kind of exercise every day, I get all antsy and restless. But I still can't believe that last month I ran a half marathon in 1 hour 43 minutes! I was hoping to finish in 2 hours and I had doubts about my ability to maintain that pace. The possibility of going faster hadn't even crossed my mind. I hope it wasn't just some kind of fluke and that I can continue to get stronger and faster. I've found lots of training plans for different length races, but no maintenance plans for the in-between times, so I've just been winging it. Here's hoping that works.

Lyric of the moment: "The world's a roller coaster. And I am not strapped in. Maybe I should hold with care. But my hands are busy in the air saying, I wish you were here..."

*According to the Oxford English dictionary, the past tense of dream is dreamt or dreamed. I like dreamt better because it sounds fancy. And dreams should be fancy. But I appreciate the ole OxEng giving us options.

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