Wednesday, April 20, 2011

Everything all at once

Yesterday, Dangers said I am always happy and quick to see the good in things. I do have a lot to smile about. I have been very fortunate and my life is good. I try to keep a positive attitude, but sometimes, at the end of the day when I finally stop moving, everything else catches up with me and I feel so many emotions all at once.

I'm super nervous yet also excited for my upcoming half marathon and marathon races. I'm worried I won't perform well, but I'm also kind of proud of all the hard work I have done just to get to the starting line. It's been months and months of hill workouts and long runs in all kinds of weather conditions. Regardless of how I finish, I am a stronger runner now than I've ever been before, and hopefully I will keep improving.

I feel simultaneously social and solitary. I've made some awesome new friends, in addition to my super amazing old friends, but sometimes it's a little sad to come home to an empty house. I'm happy to have made a home for myself here, but I can still hear the echoes of my former housemates and all the good times we had. Living here by myself, I feel too small, no matter how many cookies I eat. The older I get, the less I want to do everything alone and the more I want to be around other people.

My life is sort of in transition right now. Some endings, a lot of new beginnings. So it goes. I do so love venturing into uncharted territory, though at times it leaves me feeling a little untethered.

I have to remember that it's all about the journey. At this point, I don't even know what the destination looks like, but I plan to have a lot of fun getting there.

Lyric of the moment: "Though I know I'll never lose affection for people and things that went before, I know I'll often stop and think about them. In my life I love you more..."


  1. Jen, you are never alone! I'm always hiding in your closet! Lol

    But really I think the journey you're on is one that many don't get the opportunity to take. Everyone is in such a rush to solidify life's goals that they don't take the time to experience life.

    If had known you wanted to be tethered I would've brought my rope to tie you up!

  2. Best. Comment. Ever. Thanks Shoooter!