Tuesday, August 18, 2015

Truth and burritos

The truth about love is that it's inexorably linked to loss. The truth about strength is that it's not synonymous with stoicism. The truth about burritos is that they are delicious.
Saturday afternoon, I took Mozzie to his new home, which is basically like a doggy nirvana. Debbie and her dogs are the sweetest and I know Mozzie will be happy and well loved there. But it was still hard to let go. I would have been a mess had it not been for the endorphins (from Saturday morning's run on some of the Mighty Mosquito course) and the company (infinity of thanks to Laura and Alison for going with me).

Inadvertently, we had managed to plan a burrito-themed party to celebrate Danielle's upcoming Squamish 50K adventure the night before we had planned a 45 mile roundtrip bike trip to Burrito Fresco in Brockport. Happiest, most burrito-filled of coincidences! So the rest of the weekend I was distracted by adventures in consuming iced chai and ice cream and buying Déjà Poo at Parkleigh (because it smells good and is the most hilariously named bathroom air freshener) and having a burrito & fire pit party to celebrate Danielle's awesomeness and biking on the Erie Canal Path from Brighton to Brockport and back, with a stop for burrito lunch (Regrettably, I didn't get pictures of the best graffiti from the canal path. My favorite is the one that says something like "I tried to paint your face but it was too pretty to capture." Runner up: "Bitch took my space" with an arrow pointing to the graffiti below it). But then it was Sunday night and I was trying to avoid going home for a bit longer because I didn't want to face the emptiness of a Mozzie-less house. Pete made me dinner and made me laugh, which are two of the nicest things you can do for someone. But then I knew I had to go home. Sometimes life is sad and you can't burrito your way out of it. Sometimes the only way past is through.

Photo thanks to Laura's phone & random dude on the Erie Canal Trail
The truth is that sometimes you just have to go through all the feels. Sometimes you feel happy and sad simultaneously. Sometimes it feels uncomfortable. But that's ok. It's all ok. You can just feel however it is you feel. You don't have to judge it or feel bad about it or pretend you're ok when you're not. I don't think strength is about never showing your feelings. I think it's about being honest about them. Whenever I do that, a funny thing happens and I just feel this overwhelming sense of gratitude. Sometimes life is sad. But it is also beautiful and amazing and filled with the kindest, most awesome of people.

Lyric of the moment: "I love you more than I have ever found a way to say to you..." ~Ben Folds "The Luckiest"

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