Friday, October 9, 2015

In transition

It is a time of great transition. Everything is strange and surreal and really quite stellar. The name change is still processing so I am currently half Pratt, half Lacey. Sometimes I forget and sign the wrong name. I am living somewhere in between my house and Pete's house and the trails and our future house. Next month we will officially own three houses. That is like a tiny empire. I don't even really believe in the concept of ownership. It's as if we are playing some kind of real life Monopoly game. I am half expecting a top hat and monocle to show up in my mailbox. At this point, that seems more likely than me ever receiving my new Social Security card. I went to visit Mozzie and I told him "I got married. This is my ring." and he licked it and I was like "I know, dude. Weird, right? I am someone's wife. I made a casserole. By myself. Like a real person."

Next Saturday I have another 50K race. It will be my third in the past year (November 2014 to November 2015). How awesome is that?! Still, I feel a bit nervous. That something will go wrong on race day and it will just turn into a sufferfest. That it's a small race and I'll probably be all alone in the back and that won't be as much fun. But mostly I feel like whatever happens, it will be another great adventure that I am fortunate enough to experience. Somehow I have gotten to this place where I can just bust out a 20+ miler on trails whenever I feel like it. And really, I don't care all that much about any one day or race. I just want to be strong enough to do all the things I want to do and be active for the rest of my life.

So this is life in transition. Exciting things are happening. Uncertainty abounds. I have been called to great adventures, in running and in life. Maybe I will fail. Maybe I will be weighed and found wanting. But I know that, if nothing else, I have what it takes to laugh and keep going. And I know that everything works out. I forget this sometimes, and then life reminds me. This morning I went to the Village Bakery to get a smoothie. (I am the luckiest in that my only problem in life right now is that I have a mouth full of metal and chewing is a whole ordeal.) They were out of bananas and therefore could not make the smoothie I ordered. So they made me some kind of coffee smoothie with peanut butter in it. I am not terribly fond of coffee but peanut butter is my jam. It was delicious. And that is the story of my life: Sorry, you can't have that thing you thought you wanted. Here is something even better.

Lyric of the moment: "And the tightrope that you wander every time you have been weighed, you have been found wanting. Been wondering for days how you felt me slip your mind. Leave behind your wanton ways. I want to learn to love in kind. 'Cause you were all I ever longed for..." ~Mumford and Sons "The Wolf"

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